Woman Leaves Party After Enduring Insensitive Jokes About Her Being A Gymnast, Gets Slammed By Boyfriend For “Overreacting”

Insensitive jokes can often result in a relationship spiraling out of control. Even more so when one partner abhors the jokes at their expense. In a post on r/AITA, this is exactly what happened. The girlfriend’s former profession became a platform for sexual jokes- with the boyfriend laughing along. Needless to say, the relationship probably wouldn’t last long, given the circumstances.

OP stated, “I am a former professional gymnast and I retired last year. Now I coach other aspiring gymnasts. I’ve been dating my boyfriend for 10 months, unlike me, he isn’t in the sports industry- he is a programmer. We went to a party tonight at his friend’s house and this was a good way for him to introduce me to everyone all at once though I’ve met a couple of them.” 

Boyfriend’s Friends Make Insensitive Jokes About Girlfriend- And Boyfriend Expects Her To Be Fine With It

Until that point, things were pretty normal. But soon, people started making lewd, insensitive jokes after getting to know her profession. “I am sure many of you can guess the comments that followed, speculation on my flexibility, our bedroom activity, etc. I was very uncomfortable at this but my boyfriend just laughed along with them […] told them I didn’t like that kind of talk and that it degraded my sport how people always jump to that. My boyfriend told me to relax and they just meant it as a joke and it continued until I told my boyfriend I was going home and left clearly upset.”

At this point, anyone can assume that the situation was slowly going out of control. The boyfriend should have stopped his friends from making such jokes when his girlfriend was so affected by them. Not only did he stop them, he asked her to ‘just relax’. 

OP further wrote, “It’s now nearly 1 am and I am at home upset and feeling sh***y about the whole thing. My boyfriend has been texting me saying I overreacted and how I embarrassed him and how I should expect those kinds of comments. I usually have a thicker skin about this stuff since I’ve heard it all before, girls and women who are gymnasts are often sexualised by people but I was stressed about meeting his friends and making a good impression and then ambushed by this so it got under my skin more than it usually would.” It is pretty clear that OP was really feeling agitated about the entire incident. Moreover, to see the boyfriend consider this act an embarrassment does say a lot about the character of the guy. 

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r/AITA decreed that the woman was NTA

So, what did r/AITA say about the whole debacle surrounding insensitive jokes? u/throaway_indecisive was pretty precise in their statement. They said “You did expect those kinds of comments but that doesn’t mean you have to take them. Shame on him for not standing up for you.” u/Inconceivable44 also added to this with, “This. Expecting the comments and the comments being acceptable are two completely different things. Just because a lot of people are offensive, that does not mean the offended person is the one with the problem.” 

u/Enough-Builder-2230 tried to provide a reason behind the actions of the boyfriend. “He didn’t stop them because he gets kudos from his male buds from your supposed sexual prowess- it’s an icky porny male conquest thing. By leaving you showed you weren’t a subservient sex toy. That’s why he’s embarrassed: his mates have seen that he doesn’t control you. Now you know what’s been said behind your back for the last 10 months too.” u/InternetMama also went on to state, “Bf should have supported you, even if it was a simple “okay knock it off guys” or something. Instead, he laughed right along with them and got upset when you left after being what appears to be sexually harassed by his friends. You are absolutely within your right to snap and bite his head off for his behavior! You did nothing wrong, OP.”

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