Abduction is a very real fear for many parents, and if their child were in a dangerous situation, any parent would hope that a bystander would step in to help. That was what happened recently in a department-store parking lot when a shopper confronted a man who he thought was attempting to kidnap a little girl. The well-meaning adult was incorrect, and the incident has sparked an online debate after the father posted about it on Reddit.
Following instincts
The post that was shared to Reddit reads as follows:
“To the guy who stopped me in the Ross parking lot last night. I’m the guy who had the screaming 3-year-old over my shoulder…I was not kidnapping her, I just refused to buy her 4 shower loofahs (I’m a jerk I know.) As I walked this screaming, kicking ball of anger to the car (of course I would park on the other side of the parking lot) you actually had the nerve to stand in front of me and ask my daughter if she was ok (to which she promptly said no).”
“My patience was wearing thin, I unlocked my phone and showed you my family photo wallpaper and continued to my car.”
“You did not know me or my child yet you were prepared to put yourself in a dangerous situation to keep my daughter safe. THANK YOU.”
“ORCHIDS to this guy. THIS is how we stop child abductions and trafficking.” (1)
How common is child abduction?
Child abduction is a terrible tragedy, which is why it often makes headlines and captures the attention of the nation. This, however, can make it seem far more common than it is. According to the FBI, less than 350 people under the age of 21 have been abducted each year since 2010. Considering there are more than 80 million people under 21 in the United States, this is less than 0.0005% (2).
“It doesn’t happen very often, but they’re certainly the cases that capture our attention because they strike at our worst fears,” said Robert Lowery, a vice president at the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children (NCMEC), in an interview with Reuters (3).
What’s more, in the majority of abduction cases, the child is kidnapped by a non-custodial parent, rather than a stranger. In fact, abduction by a stranger is the rarest reason that a child goes missing.
Read: Idaho Man Quits His High-Paying Job to Build Beds for Kids Who Sleep on the Floor
Mixed reactions
Since the Reddit post was published to the site, it has amassed more than 20 thousand votes and hundreds of comments. People have mixed opinions, and some praised the bystander for stepping in when he thought something was amiss. On the other hand, some questioned whether the same thing would have happened if it had been a woman carrying the child, and argued that the case was a demonstration of sexism.
“Very true,” said one commenter named Zash-Ketchum. “But if I was the father in this situation I would be so thankful that some random person had the courage to follow their instincts (even though they were wrong) and confront what could be a very dangerous man.”
Vladius28, however, was less certain.
“I have so many mixed opinions on this,” he said. “On the one hand, I’m sure the concern was genuine. On the other, I would feel pretty hurt and borderline victimized if I were in the dad’s position.”
No-Addendum-3117 took the argument one step further and asked: “Would they have stopped a woman with a screaming child?” While another user, ARoyaleWithCheese, argued the man’s actions weren’t that effective, anyway.
“While well-intended, this is practically useless at stopping child abductions,” they argued. “Almost all child abductions are by (one of the) parents or by a family/friend.”
How to spot a kidnapper
It can be difficult to spot a kidnapper, but there are some subtle cues that can give them away. If you see an adult asking a child for help, for example, that should be a red flag. Under normal circumstances, an adult who needs help will ask another adult, not a child.
Lone adults who are hanging around areas where children play, offer toys or candy to children, or who ask for directions from kids are also suspicious individuals, and you should eye them with caution. Again, a normal adult will ask another adult for directions (or use a GPS), not a child.
Someone who is trying to abduct a child may also know a lot about the child and their family, which can trick even some adults. Using social media, a kidnapper can know the names of the child’s parents, other family members, and friends and use this information to make them seem trustworthy. They can then approach the child and say something like “your mother is in the hospital and you have to visit her right now.” This is almost certainly foul play.
If you see something suspicious you can, as the shopper in the Reddit post did, approach the child and ask them if they’re OK, and if they know the adult they’re with. If you’re afraid it’s not safe to approach the person, your other option is to take note of as many details as possible (where you are, what car the person is driving, the license plate number, etc.) and call local law enforcement right away. Your actions could save a child’s life.
Keep Reading: Children End School Bus Hijacking By Asking Lots Of Questions
Sources
- “Shopper Who Confronted Man ‘Kidnapping’ Screaming Girl Sparks Debate.” Newsweek. Rebecca Flood. September 24, 2021.
- “Resident population of the United States by sex and age as of July 1, 2020.” Statista
- “Kidnapped children make headlines, but abduction is rare in U.S..” Reuters. Staff.
Attention: While many of these stories are interesting, and we would love to take their word for it, the content in this article was taken from an unverifiable source (i.e., a Reddit forum). As such, we cannot guarantee that these events truly happened in the way that they are described in the original source.
